#1 - Introduction, Berserk, A Game of Thrones

Introduction

So, this is my first blogpost. To be honest, I'm going to just go with the flow and write about whatever I want at times that are best for me. I'm not sure how I should best format this, or how long I will continue, or what I should even write about. However, for now, I'll just go with the flow, and hopefully have fun with it. :) 

Berserk (contains spoilers)

I've been wanting to write about Berserk for the longest time ever since I finished reading the manga in April, but I didn't have a platform to express my thoughts until now. Berserk is, without a doubt, the best thing I've ever read, and will likely continue to be for some time. 

I initially introduced myself to the world of Berserk by watching the 1997 anime adaption, and didn't think too much of it at first. In turn, I actually really struggled to get into the first few chapters of the manga. It took me around four to five attempts to really get going, since the initial contents contain so much heavy plot and action jam-packed into the introduction. However, once I finally got going, I was left speechless and mind-blown. I found myself reading for hours at a time, day after day, not wanting to stop, never wanting to waver and close the Chrome tab. The first arc of the story was absolutely beautiful, creating a setting for some of the most powerful character connections I've ever discovered in any media, and eventually coming out the end of the arc with one of the worst human betrayals I have ever had the misfortune of reading. Even thinking back to it now, it hurts me, just recollecting the memories of when I read The Eclipse for the first time. The themes of anger, revenge, pain, despair, hurt; the drive for human ambition and the price that one may pay for their ambition; all of it combines so, so well to create the story of Berserk. And, aside from pure literature, even just the artwork of Berserk is something so good that I can't even begin to find the words for it. You just have to look at some of the double-spread pages and ultimately stare in awe at the unbelievable image presented in front of you, acknowledging that this is the work of one singular man with a pen and a desire to create a story from within his mind. I've included an example of his masterful work below. This is just ONE PANEL out of 365 CHAPTERS

The Eclipse, Chapter 74

The connection between Guts and Casca is the best romantic connection I've ever come across. It's so raw, so painful, so realistic, and I found myself getting so personally attached to Casca that I felt real, physical anger whenever awful things were happening to her. The juxtaposition between the awful, grim world, compared to the simple beauty of human connection, is one theme that will always stick with me from my time reading Berserk. I feel like, in a story so complex and dark as Berserk, the one truly special thing that comes from it is the ability to portray the simplicity of human connection and finding a reason to live, to carry on, to fight another day. One scene I feel obliged to bring up is when Guts and Casca embraced for the first time together as lovers, before The Eclipse. On an initial viewing, it's such a simple scene, presented with nothing but two people talking to each-other, and nothing more. And yet, in spite of these facts, it remains as my absolute favourite scene in the entire show. The dialogue shared between them was so powerful, conveying so much emotion, and really opening up a new angle to the story of Berserk; a much simpler, softer, emotional and mellow angle. I very much like to reflect back on this scene after getting to the later parts of the story and acknowledging just how simple things were back then, before things got extremely dark, twisted and complicated. While Casca may have lost almost everything that made her "Casca", and while Guts is full of pain, despair and suffering, he refuses to stop, refuses to give up, refuses to say "no." I feel like this is a really powerful theme to portray, and it really hits me when he reflects back on how Casca used to be before The Eclipse. Still, in spite of this, he pushes on for her sake. That is the power of human connection and, in my opinion, is a big part of what makes Berserk so special. 

As I was reading through the chapters before reaching the inevitable, sudden end of Berserk, I eventually reached Chapter 354, just 9 chapters before the very last chapter. Within this chapter contained one of the most emotionally captivating panels I have ever seen in a manga. Once I got to this panel, which was of Casca regaining her conscience and recollecting all of her memories with Guts and the journey of the past 250+ chapters, it quite simply broke me. I try not to overexaggerate this statement, since I feel like it could come across as quite cringe-worthy, but I'm really not downplaying the phrase "it broke me." I had waited over ~250 chapters to get to this point (an equivalence of Miura taking 10 years to get to this chapter from the prologue chapters) and the payoff from this one very special panel did not disappoint. I'll show it here because why not: 

Casca, Chapter 354

When I first saw this panel, I just couldn't contain my emotions. It was the culmination of this entire journey, this entire struggle for Guts to keep going. When Casca was asked "Do you remember who Guts is?" and she responds with this expression, the floodgates opened. It was everything I ever wanted, everything I was waiting for. Despite having no dialogue, all it takes is one facial expression to give me the answer I need, and after seeing her remain completely emotionless for over 250 chapters, this was, without a doubt, the perfect panel to convey everything she is feeling and still retains within her emotions and feelings. It's so simple, yet conveys so many words. There is something very special about Berserk with how it's able to play with the reader's emotions like this, as none other thus far has been able to manage the same effect. Sure, I've cried at other medias, but not at the level that this panel did to me. It is the work of years of of pain, suffering, despair, misery; and I can say with absolute sincerity that it was worth all of it, just to see that one panel.

While I appreciate the action, the fighting, and the complex, detailed story, the one thing that really connected to me with Berserk was feeling something for every single character, whether it was pure HATRED for one character, or utter despair for another. The ability to draw out such a range of emotions on the reader is an incredible skill, and it genuinely pains me to know that we will never see how Berserk ends.

However, one thing that is for sure is that, as long as I try, I will never forget this masterpiece. It will live alongside me as I try my best to find my own path in life. I am so glad I gave myself the opportunity to read this manga, and I urge anyone who hasn't read it to give it a try. The initial pages can be a bit long-winded and very overwhelming, but trust me, the payoff is worth it ten-fold.

Berserk never ceases to blow my mind, and I will forever hold the mangaka in a special place inside my heart. Thank you and RIP, Kentaro Miura.

A Game of Thrones

I began reading A Game of Thrones a few weeks ago. I bought the books months back after finishing the TV series, but to be honest, I really struggled to read the first few pages because I struggled to form the image in my mind. I find that when I try to start reading any type of media, whether it's a book or a manga, I have to grind through it and get into a flow, and I often struggle to get into that flow. However, now that I'm into that flow and I'm starting to get a clearer image in my head, it's starting to get very enjoyable. I've realised that, although this might be blatantly obvious to say, the comparison between the books and the show is insane. It's almost like I'm reliving the TV show inside my head while I'm picturing it as I read, and it's a really fun concept. I still struggle to create some images in my head as I read, because I'm not the most creative person, and at times like these it's a little frustrating because it ruins my immersion a bit when I'm unable to flow from one image to the next. I figure that this is also why I appreciate reading manga, because I don't have to force my small brain to create an image in my head, since it's already given to me directly. 

I'm excited to continue reading A Game of Thrones, and I may post another update when I feel like it.

Well, I'll end my first blogpost here. It was quite a long one, mainly because I had so many thoughts about Berserk that I wanted to share. To be honest, I could have written more, but what I had written down conveyed my core feelings well enough,  and once I get my core feelings down, I'm happy with it. Thanks for reading! Until next time.

Connor Lunnon 20/05/2022